Tuesday, June 28, 2011

It's been awhile...

I don't even know where to begin this post. Should I start with telling you how it's felt kind of nice to have one area in my life where I've been able to disappear? Because it has been.

or perhaps tell you that we're okay. we're surviving. we have fun, hang out with friends, and even laugh - things I honestly thought I wouldn't never be able to do after losing my baby.

We're approaching what would have been Freddie's 3-month birthday and things have drastically changed in our lives. In the last few months we had our baby, lost our baby, graduated from college, buried our baby in Utah, moved from Arizona to Utah, moved in with my parents, and tried to feel some kind of normalcy in a world that doesn't stop.

Things have been non-stop insane and busy. Which in some ways is good. Busy is good for me. I only cry a tiny bit when things are busy.

We've been asked a ton of questions from people ranging from friends to strangers. Because of the outpouring of love and support, I don't feel like people are butting in. Yes, this is our struggle. But if by not holding it in we can heal a little more, help someone else, or just get thoughts/feelings off our (my) chest - then I don't mind being an open book.

With that being said, if you have a question...ask it. Now's your chance to ask the question you're wondering about, or want to ask me in person but don't dare. I don't mind. Feel free to leave a question in the comments section with or without your name - I'll do my best to answer all questions in a post next week.

I plan to get back to my regular posts - griping, complaining, or making fun of my husband but I don't feel like I'm at that point yet. So bear with me. 


Caro said...

Take all the time you need and dont forget to rest and to enjoy life with Fred.

The Railsback's said...

your amazing is all I have to say! One of the strongest people I know, and I am so lucky to be able to call you my friend!

Jared and Davian said...

You are amazing Chana! I am so glad you are able to feel some type of normalcy in your life. You are a great strength and example of how to rely on and trust in the Lord through trials and heartache. Thank you for being YOU and sharing your feelings so freely on your blog.

My question is: When are we seriously going to get together to laugh, catch up and bake? Next question: We need a datenight with our husbands to happen as well, when will it be? Feel free to answer these questions via text! Not sure everyone needs to know when we plan on baking.... they'll show up and eat all of our amazing cupcakes! :(

I am also excited for this weekend to start Chana Days!! To celebrate I will be getting my wisdom teeth out so feel free to party without me. I hope you have a very happy & wonderful birthday weekend!

The Millers said...

I read your post yesterday and didn't have any pressing questions but as I was going about my day yesterday I thought of one.

Never having been through a trial like that, I don't always know what is comforting to say. What were the things people said to you that were the most comforting and helpful?

This will give us all an idea of maybe how we can help someone by even just saying the right thing in the future.

Thanks! Love you! Miss you!

Jared and Davian said...

I must agree with the previous comment....

What is comforting to say to someone who is going through such a traumatic and heart breaking event?

What is helpful to have others do for you?

What is the hardest thing to hear from others when you know they don't mean it to be harmful! or insensitive but to you it is?

Have you been given any answers (medically) as to why you just went into labor on your own so early?

Lindsey Stewart said...

I love you Chana! and Miss you. We need to hang out sometime now that you are in Utah.
Question: Did they try and stop your labor?